HYGGEME - SHIFTING BLAME

As I have opened my eyes , over the years , to the actions and words of others I have learned valuable lessons  .

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I would say I have become extremely perceptive and aware of other people's actions and how to not  let them impact on me. I have learned to protect my aura as much as possible . 

Over  the past couple of weeks I have come across what I call a shift in blame. Offloading all responsibility and fault to another person to protect yourself at all cost . 

This to me is a cowards action . This is what happens when people can't admit their short comings and failings , instead they shift the blame onto the other person, using negative and destructive words with no prior discussion . 

I' m disappointed you did not take action  - no question or thought given to , maybe there was a good reason I didn't take action .

I don't think you are at the right stage for this - no information or back up to this statement just an assumption based on their thoughts . 

Ultimately what I know from this and from book after book, I have read , is none of the above statements were really about my short comings . They were about theirs and their inability to be truthful.

One word springs to mind cowards . Instead of taking action and responsibility for their decisions and actions they blame shift . 

I have come across this recently in two different aspects of my life , from two very different people but both not having the courage, strength or compassion to stand up and be truthful . 

7 years ago this would have sent me into a frenzy of tears, anger and made me feel yet again worthless. Today  I feel strong , amazing and happy these things happened as I can actually see them for what they are , their shortfalls in life . 

Disappointed I am, as i more than anyone know the harm lying and blame shift can cause to a person who is weak .Luckily I am strong now and just glad my eyes have been opened . 

Love  

KF X  

HYGGEME- surround yourself with people who reduce the stress not cause it .

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The past week other things have got in the way of HYGGEME ... I would love to say they were important things,  that needed HYGGEME's full attention but they were not . They were negative situations that entered into my life that I let consume me .

Yes even KF Miss positivity can have a lapse . 

With all the work I do on building HYGGEME , the passion I have for everything it is about, the time I spend writing and working on the positive inspiration how did this happen . 

i can't say there is just one reason there are lots of small reasons , that I let build up , instead of dealing with them one by one as they were presented to me .  

When under attack, after trying to seek help in a certain situation, I did not protect my positivity . I reacted back to that aggression in a negative way  . I let that negativity creep into my life and consume my mind . 

Sleepless nights started as I let my mind take control and escalated the situation into a huge elephant in the room. 

I should have initially not let the negativity and aggression have an impact on me , I should have met it with love and positivity , not allowing myself to become negative . 

The wake up call came when It was having impact on my health and the way I was interacting with others . Tears , anger , tiredness and my whole lust for life I was struggling to find .  

The realisation that it had taken control of me came to me suddenly and I knew I had to use all the tools I talk about and have used to get my mindset back to where it had been for a long time - positive , happy , open to everything with a hunger for life and a fear of nothing . 

I started where I started right at the beginning of all this. Seeing the most amazing women who I go to for Reiki . I sat and talked and talked before my reiki ., in the past she has had to give me the tools and advice to deal with situation but this time , I told her what I had to do and her words were "see you have all the answers so just go do it " . An intense reiki session followed this and I knew I had to work on protecting myself from the negative energy I was being faced with .

Today I faced that negativity with positivity , a smile , huge hope and feelings of happiness for the future ahead . No of course all the negativity around me hasn't  gone ,to the challenges I am faced with daily haven't disappeared but I'm able to not let them have impact on the happy , outgoing , positive and adventurous person I am . 

Even the founder of HYGGEME has some weeks to work on being drawn into negativity and over come her fears . 

For me now I just want to continue working to help others learn to lead a positive , happy life and learn to enjoy simple pleasures . 

love

KF X  

HYGGEME-start living the life you dream of .

Over the past few years I have heard and discussed with so many people about wanting to live a different life . 

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The common denominator in all these conversations has been work . Each and every person was getting up each Monday with a weight on their shoulders, a heaviness for the week ahead and a longing for Friday to come . 

The conversations were and are usually along the same lines -

 I want to be doing something different .

I'm just bored .

I get no satisfaction from my work .

I am so unhappy . 

My work is draining the life out of me . 

I could go on and on with these statements as I've heard and said so many of them myself .  

Instead of living a life we now work to live . 

So what is it that is stopping all these people from living the life they dream of . A life more fulfilling , a happier life and a life that makes every Monday a pleasure to wake up to .

One word - FEAR  

Fear of the unknown  .

Fear of failure .  

Fear of paying bills.  

Fear of losing the stability.  

That word is the one and only thing stopping all these people .

What if all these people though faced their fear started living the life they dream of , changed what they did on a Monday morning and started to take that first step to a happier life ? 

I have had the pleasure to know a lovely, bright, bubbly, fun living girl for many years through work . She has been a huge supporter of HYGGEME and also leaving lovely comments on the quotes that are posted . Last week I read,in one of her posts, that she had left her work .I sent her a message wishing her well for the future and asking what she was going to be doing .Her reply I don't know !

This beautiful girl inside and out had become unhappy, lost her confidence and felt let down by the way others  around her had been treated . This amazing girl wasn't going to carry on living a life that was unhappy , unfulfilled and draining her . This girl took control of her life , felt the fear and left her job . 

A lot of  people's reaction to this was your mad ! Mine was quite the opposite I was so proud of her for leaving the  part of her life that made her unhappy . I loved her excitement and enthusiasm for the unknown .. instead of being scared of the unknown she was excited , happy and hugely optimistic .

overcoming her fear had allowed her to become happy again and start living a life rather than working to live . I of course understand more than anyone we all have bills to pay and commitments but if we want to change our life's to a happier one we also need to make changes to our current situation . Clearing debts , simplifying our life's and cutting our cloth accordingly .

Fears don't stop death , we have no control over that , they stop life . They stop us living the life that we dream of . A life of happiness .. I'm not talking about a life full of material things . 

A life of happiness. 

A life full of love for each day. 

A life that has a purpose . 

A life full of simple pleasures. 

I myself am so inspired by my friends story it has pushed me as well to face my fears .

Love 

KF x  

HYGGEME -overcoming fear.

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Since I started HYGGGEME I am often sent messages thanking HYGGEME for the posts and comments on how that days quotes really helped them at the very moment they needed it .

Sometimes in life things are presented to us at just the right moment . Afiter all they do say ask and you shall receive .  

During some of my darkest moments I never use to ask I use to battle instead . Now I always ask deep within myself for help, guidance and strength to get me through difficult situations . 

Every HYGGEME quote/ affirmation has a unique meaning behind it and bring thoughts of joy, strength , encouragement , hope and positivity when you most need it .  

I have been thinking long hard about how I can help more through HYGGEME and I have been exploring the avenue of the quotes and affirmations I give to people in private to make these public , to help more people who are feeling the same way draw hope and strength from these as well . 

HYGGEME will start doing weekly and eventually daily short blogs on one particular affirmation or quote   based on the messages from HYGGEME followers looking to draw strength on a particular subject . 

Today irs fear . So many people have both sent messages and commented on this subject .The questions , statements and comments do not necessarily have the word fear in them , but they are all centred a round fear . 

"I don't want to be on my own , I want to have a partner " 

"I hate my job / career but need the money to pay the bills "

"I push people away that get close to me , how can I stop doing this and why do I do it " 

These 3 simple statements I have read over and over again through HYGGEME and I am also confronted with these in my everyday life by friends , acquaintances and reading people's posts on social media .

What is at the very core of all these statements ? ..,FEAR.  

FEAR  of being on their own - they would rather have anyone in their than  the thought of the possibility of having a happier life , a more content one living their life . People then but all their happiness onto having the attachment of a partner rather than overcoming that fear and living their life and building a life for them . The result they end up clinging to someone who is not right for them , who possibly let's them down , who has a difficult outlook on life to them .., they will settle for just having someone rather than the right one . 

FEAR of failure building the life you truly desire - instead of just giving it a go they come up with so many excuses as to why they can't build the life doing what the love . Most of this usually relates to money but if you push that fear aside and turn it into love and passion for what you do then that fear no longer exists and you will only ever fail  when you stop trying .  

FEAR of being hurt - as soon people begin to get close to them they find ways ( subtle ways ) of pushing them away rather than letting go of that fear and just enjoying the path , they end up causing the hurt rather than overcoming or letting go of their fears .  

What do they need to do to overcome this FEAR  

Love - learn to love your life on your own . See it as an opportunity to do the things that excite and inspire you. Live a life full of the things that make you happy . Simple pleasures can bring you the most rewards and learning to enjoy your own company brings a calmness to your life .

LOVE- learn to love your ideas and the thoughts that inspire you everyday . Learn to be enthusiastic about what inspires . Love , do not fear , that we all have the ability to change our careee direction . Channel all your efforts into doing what you love then your work will not be a chore but a passion . Of course you may not be able to quit your current job but you can start making the shift to creating a life and career you love . Open your mind to opportunities and turn that fear of the future into the love of a more fulfilled life .  

LOVE- start loving the people and opportunities that come your way . See them as part of the journey and but do not attach them to your overall happiness . People come into your life as a compliment to it not to fix you and your life . Let these people in , let yourself enjoy the journey but do not attach your whole life's happiness to that one person . You have no control over how anothers treat you but you have control over yourself and how you respond to those situations .. if someone shows you kindness learn to embrace it , take it do not be fearful of it . Living in the moment can help us in these situations , just enjoy the present moment and do not look too far forward . Life is happening now and today is all we have for today . 

 Remember this "everything that is feared cannot be loved and everything that is loved cannot be feared" .

If you start to love then there will be no fear .

As light overcomes darkness , love onercomes feae. 

This  has been such a rewarding morning writing this and please keep sending your comments , requests and stories , each one inspires me daily to be grateful for HYGGEME and doing what I love .

Thank you  

KF X  

HYGGEME 3 DAY CLEANSE

Love yourself inside and out .  

Love yourself inside and out .  

A huge part of why I created HYGGEME was also to improve on myself both inside and out . Like everyone I have days , weeks and months I struggle with every day life and turn to food for comfort .  I also love to cook and fit this into my life as pleasure time for me. A Sunday afternoon cooking with a glass of wine is one of my favourite pleasures . 

What I have been noticing recently , as I get older , is my skin seems to be getting duller and my metabolic rate has slowed down . With that need to increase my level of activity to keep my metabolic rate going . Someone I know was planning on doing a 3 day juice cleanse that she had bought and I was intrigued by this and decided to develop my own and give it a go . 

After spending time researching and trawling the internet for inspiration and facts I was ready to start planning my own . Like everything i try to do in my life now I wanted to keep the juice cleanse simple  . I decided to use Monday ,Tuesday and Wednesday as my 3 days to do the HYGGEME CLEANSE that way  as

• I could still enjoy my weekends.

• Easy to fit round my work . 

• Great way to cleanse yourself inside after a weekend of indulgence. 

• Allows you the Sunday to do the prep. 

I must say I found it a lot easier than I imagined to do . At no point did I feel hungry  however I do think I was in the mindset that I wanted to see it through and feel the benefits .

I was very surprised by the results and all in just 3 days . 

• My skin was brighter and clearer.. By morning of the 3rd day I actually didn't mind looking in the mirror first thing at my face . This change didn't go unnoticed by others , it  motivated me even more when people commented how good my skin looked . 

• My eyes had lost all puffiness . Over the past couple of years I had noticed my eyes beng puffy in the morning this was the one thing I was extremely surprised at the results of the cleanse . 

• That mid afternoon slump at work disappeared. Usually by 3 I would start to feel a lack of energy and motivation however I felt more alert and brighter throughout this time . 

• My stomach felt flatter and less bloated . I am not a believer in scales or weighing yourself however I do know by the fit of my clothes my waistline felt neater and overall I felt better about myself . 

• I had more energy and my running and exercise seemed to benefit from the extra energy . 

This is not a diet , this is not about losing weight this about self improvement from the inside . If you are wanting something to cleanse yourself inside and out and make you feel better than I would recommend giving it ago . For 3 days just feeding your body lots of goodness and natural food .

WIth all of the cleanse juices recipes feel free to adapt your own using the fruits and vegetables you like . It's good to add your own spin and identity to this . 

Also if you do struggle , as I did , with missing that savoury taste sensation keep a jar of picked beetroot or onions to hand !

SHOPPING LIST  

strawberries ( frozen or fresh ) 

bananas ( ripe )

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blueberries  

pear  

kiwi

avocado

spinach ( frozen or fresh) 

Fresh mint  ( buy a potted one ) 

limes  

honey  

oats  

beetroot  

pineapple    

THE BREAKFAST CLEANSE  

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handful oats   

Strawberries a large handful approx 9 

blueberries  

banana  

water  

ice  

honey  

THE GREEN ONE  ( the pick me up ) 

spinach (  la arge handful ) 

mango 1/2  

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pimeapple 8 cubes

mint  

squeeze of lime  

spoonful of honey 

Cup of water  

ice  

THE GREEN ONE ( the refresher )  

spinach ( a large  handful  )

avocado ( 1/4) 

pear  

kiwi 

pineapple (handful cubes ) 

squeeze of lime  

water  

spoonful honey  

mint  

I drank 4 a day and tended to make double of one of the green ones . I would pack as much spinach and mint in a I could . 

The last thing couple of things I would recommend is to drink as much water as possible and I would also recommend kick starting your day with some apple cider vinegar in a cup of warm water with lime juice and honey to help kick start your cleanse . 

I would love to hear how you get on with it if you try it and remember if you want to introduce some product snack on some unsalted nuts .

Healthy body / healthy mind  .

 

love 

KF

( founder HYGGEME)  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Focus on the positive , eliminate the negative and watch you our life move in the right direction .

 

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HEALING HANDS - Reflexology

For a while now I have been on a journey of self help & self care . I have discovered that the types of therapy my mind and body respond most to are the alternative ones .

Today, for the first time , I went for  a hour session of reflexology . With other relaxation treatments, like massage,I have always struggled to fully relax and my mind tends to run wild as I lie there and by the end I am no more relaxed than when I first arrived . Today instantly it was different .

As I lay there under the warm blanket all warm and safe , Cloda started to work on my left foot . Instantly I felt my mind drifting into a more calm , relaxed state . All the strain & pressure our feet must carry we never give a thought to . They are the very things that keep as grounded and every ounce of our body is carried by our feet .

I am amazed how a   foot massage is actually healing. A very large number of nerve endings are concentrated on the soles, and opposite ends of those same nerves are spread in all other parts of the body. Accordingly, feet represent a map of the whole body. 

One of the main things that attracted me to reflexology was that one of the benefits is to help with mental health and wellness . Having suffered depression for years I am constantly searching for new techniques to relieve stress and promote a happier and healthier me . 

I always repeat in my head some positive affirmations when staring any type of therapy . They change each time depending on what is going on in my life at the time today my affirmations were all about HYGGEME and how it is bring so much positivity and happiness to my life and how I can visualise it growing into something very special and unique .

i lay with those thoughts in my head as Cloda worked across each toe working firmly on every part and as she did my body and mind were reaping the benefits . I was aware that my right foot,  that wasn't getting worked on, was beginning to feel heavier and heavier. Or was it that all the stresses and strains were being lifted from left foot it was feeling rejuvenated , lighter and the feeling was brining a calmness to me mentally and physically .

i have regular Reiki and the healing power I get during that I never thought I would experience during other treatment until today . I would thoroughly recommend this to anyone who is suffering any type of stress.  

i also have to thank the lovely Cloda from SKinfinti for working her magic . 

kim flower  

Founder of  HYGGEME  

 

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SELF CARE

This sometime we all to often do not practise . This is vital for our health and well being . If we do not look after ourself first then  it can have huge impact on the other relationships we have in our life's . With a simple routine we can start to implement some self care into our life's .

1.SLEEP- this is vital in order to function well and feel good about our ourselves . Getting to bed that little bit earlier,  every night,  can have a great impact on our next day .

2. EXERCISE - whatever is your thing walking, running , yoga just do it . Just get out there and get those good endorphins going , this is one thing you will never regret doing only not doing . Just do it as Nike says . 

3. POSITIVE THINKING - fuel your mind , body and spirit well . Each day wake up and change your mindset to a positive thought for the day ahead . This is going to be a fantastic day where I will feel fulfilled . .. Positivity will change your life .

4. WRITE- offload your thoughts into paper or a tablet . Write down your worries turn them into actions . Write down your dreams and turn them into plans . Write down what makes you smile and do more of that .

5. BREATHE - take 5 minutes, out each day,  to just be , to learn to live and feel yourself in the moment . Not thinking aboiyt the future of the past . Mindfulness apps and YouTube are great for this . Get this into your daily routine and you will reap the benefits . Start today and learn to take care of yourself.

learn to love yourself first .  

Kim Flower 

(founder of HYGGEME)  

.#hygge #hyggeme #hyggeyourself #loveyourself #selfcare #selfimprovement #selflove #exercise #breathe #sleep #positivethinking #plan #inspireyourself #motivate 

SELF CARE  

SELF CARE  

MIND OVER MATTER

I have over the past few years  bagged a couple of Munros , so when asked by a friend if I fancied going walking in Arran I was totally up for the challenge , oh and a challenge it was indeed !One of total mind over matter .

The walk in total was 19km, which started by walking up Glen Sannox to the saddle then back down through Glen Rosa . The views were amazing walking up Glen Sannox . Heather covered hills with deer everywhere . Scotland at its finest . As we reached up towards The Saddle the weather turned colder , snow started to fall and the wind grew stronger .

I am a strong , determined person but I have to admit in the final 20minutes of my ascent I nearly crumbled .There is a part leading up to THe Saddle called the Whin Dyke it is narrow , very steep and is mostly flat rocks which were covered in ice and snow .I was determined to get up to the top however fear had also kicked in at this point .

Fear is such an unnecessary drain of your energy . I was fearing something that hadn't happened . As I hung there gripping to the Whin Dyke I knew I had to take control of my mind and thoughts or I would not make it . My legs had frozen on the spot,  my mind was not willing them to move . My friend , who was behind me, sensed this and being more than qualified  in dealing with this type of situation , was patient yet firm with me . As I listened to his words I knew there and then I had to change my mind set .

I started imaging myself at the top , I told myself I was strong enough to do this , i told myself to get a grip and just tackle this as I had tackled every  hurdle, obstacle , problem in my life - head on with determination and strength . Those 20minutes were the longest period of what was a 5 hour hike however as I got to the top and gave my friend the biggest hug of gratitude I was yet again overcome by how strong and powerful tool your mind is . No matter how strong you are physically if your mindset isn't right you will never achieve great things .

Go on challenge your mind !!

Kim Flower 

Founder of HYGGEME  

MIND OVER  MATTER  

MIND OVER  MATTER  

DON'T LET LONELINESS LEAD TO LUST

LONELINESS

There are so many lonely people out there desperate for companionship and conversation. On the flip side there are so many predators out there looking,  and happy, to take advantage of that loneliness.When these two worlds collide it creates a place of desperation ,heartache, anxiety and lies.

Why would I ever consider visiting such an awful place ?Where is this destructive place ? 

THE DATING SITE

This is a common place ,in  this era, to discuss with friends on a daily basis.  Delve beneath the surface of the place that promises to find your perfect " MATCH" and you find an abundance of lonely people and going through difficult times .These people are desperate for some companionship and conversation in the darkest parts of their day and night. Mix this with an abundance of predators, using this place to take advantage of that loneliness for their own selfish pleasure, and you created a recipe for self destruction and more loneliness .

I've been one of those lonely people, at certain points in my life. Living in hope of finding "the one " , the one that ticked all the boxes. I soon realised I had to start working on myself first, ticking my own boxes and learning to love myself . I realised I should be visiting a place full of positivity, motivation, inspiration and one to give genuine hope but  where did I find such a place ?

Well I didn't I created one HYGGEME. A place where anyone can click on and visit day or night to feel positive, motivated and inspired to improve themselves and their lives. HYGGEME changed my life and helped me to love myself and enjoy simple pleasures. Let it do the same for you. Come follow and share HYGGEME to help us all live a more positive life .