This was one of the things , that I have to admit took the longest time to do . Probably as I did not realise,at the time, there was so much surrounding me that was having a negative impact on my life .
Of course I knew looking too much at the past was not good for me or my health, however I was totally unaware that what was surrounding me everyday was draining any positive energy I had . It was making me create a very negative mindset to my every day life and even my life looking forward .
When I first met this wonderful lady , MIriam who became my mentor , instantly I connected with her and realised my whole life was filled with negative energy . My home , the company I kept , family ,work the list goes on . I knew that day something was going to and had to change . My heart was aching , I craved to be loved but yet I did not even like myself let alone love myself . How could I attract love if I couldn't find it within myself and so my journey began .
I must have cried 3 hours solid on my first visit to Miriam . I knew, without even having to talk , initially , that Miriam knew I was in pain , desperately needed help and wanted to bring some hope to my life . Slowly I began to open up about life , my past , my current life , the people in my life , my family , death , loss , hate and fear of my life being like this forever . I hated myself , I hated people who had judged , I hated people who had let me down , the list goes on .
The first thing I was taught was the phrase "let it go with love " . I had to let all that brought me to be in these place go, but not just that I had to learn to love the fact that it brought me to this place . You might think I would have struggled with this thought , given the state of self hate I was in , but I embraced it and began to realise all that had happened was meant to happen .
I've hated that phrase in the past " it happened for a reason " . Following experiencing the death of my dad and then a close friend this phrase I heard a lot . It use to anger me - what you are telling me the two people who were so caring , did selfless acts for others deaths happened for a reason ? Why not take the killers , the drug dealers I use to think . Only now do I begin to understand that . It's hard to put into words but it's not about just one thing e.g. The death of one person it's about everything else that happens as a result of that , how people react and ultimately how people learn and grow from it .
i have been able to let my past life go with love . I do know I would not be the person I am today ,doing what I'm doing had it not been for everything that I did and everything that has happened . I now understand that we are not here to be attached to others , we raise our kids to be strong independent people free of attachments . Happiness or success should never be dependent on any thing , any place, and particularly , any person. This is one of the most valuable shift s in mindset I have had . Be open to everything in life but attached to nothing .
As my mindset changed from negative to positive I noticed that relationships I had were not positive but negative ones . I slowly distanced myself from people whos very values were all about attachment to people and possessions. I slowly stepped back and created the life I love , started doing the things that made me happy , being the person I enjoyed spending time with . Listening to gossip , basing friendships on who had what was never something that made me happy. It use to create anger inside me that I had allowed this type of person into my life . Eliminating that negativity from my life brought so much positivity to mine . No judgements anymore , no attachments just me being me , doing what I love.
HYGGE as you know is all about creating coziness and contentment into your home . Although HYGGEME is about applying the HYGGE values to yourself I definitely had to do some work on my home too . I soon realised my home was full of negativity too. I started to eliminate this negativity and clutter from my home which in turn has had a positive impact to my life . Simple things like clearing out wardrobes , cupboards and boxes stored in the attic have allowed me to think clearly again in my house . Everyday tasks , now that things are more organised, are easier to do . Being a full time working mum , on her own and with two kids you need your home to be clutter free ! ( well apart from mollys room she hasn't caught onto to HYGGE yet ) . Keeping the corners of my rooms free of clutter was a tip my Reiki teacher taught me and I have a Ganesh to pick up this week which will hopefully help positivity and the flow of money in the right direction moving forward .
I will continue down this path of elimation with small steps everyday . A friend I have known since I was 4 recently commented how he had a sign above his desk "throw something out everyday ". He know has next to zero clutter and he says it has totally transformed his life , his productivity and even his bank balance .
Focus on the positive , eliminate the negative and watch your life change for the better .
Some useful links to help inspire you -
16 ways to simplify your life -
19 easy ways to simplify your life -
25 ways to simplify your life in less that 10 minutes -
FOUNDER OF HYGGEME